Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Living a Lie...My Truth....

From extreme dieting and bulimia to food addiction and weight gain. The insane use of diuretics to laxatives I have been there. I could go on, but to keep it simple, I have experienced almost every eating disorder there is. Food and I have not always had the best relationship. As a matter of fact until a year ago food was always my enemy. Not the easiest thing to admit when you own a CrossFit gym and promote a healthy lifestyle day in and day out. Crazy right...I know. I have lived most of my life questioning every single calorie, counting down the minutes till I was able to work out and work off what I had eaten that day. If I didn't well then that's when all the other fun stuff above would come in. I will save you the details for another time. I would feel this way even consuming the healthiest of didn't matter. It was calories that I didn't want and certainly thought I didn't need. I knew that was no way to live. I knew I was going against my entire beliefs, not to mention being super hypocritical to all my clients, friends and family. I was living a lie. I did everything in my power to help everyone around me while for some reason continuously sabotaging myself. Pretty sad and by far one of the hardest things for me to share publicly. But it is time. I have battled with this my entire life and I can honestly say that for the first time I am OFFICIALLY healthy. I have had to learn the LONG hard way how to rid my self of these horrible demons but I believe it was a for a much larger purpose. I have a passion for helping women. Empowering them. Curing themselves of all of the negative hatred that society has created for looking a certain way. Skin and bones? I think NOT. Eat this, do that blah blah blah. IT'S ALL HORSE SHIT. Ladies what we think is attractive isn't! Curves are HOT and MUSCLE is SEXY! PERIOD!  Do I still battle with these demons every day? YES! And I will forever. It is all about how I do though. Here is the thing...... as long as I stand my ground and keep to my path of pure food I will always win this battle. Food is no longer my enemy. Food is what fuel's my body to live a happy and healthy life. I look forward to each day now, rather than hating living a life of constant worry. HATING LIVING A LIE. Everyone has their own journey in life. I feel my journey happened for me to realize what I am supposed be doing with my life. THIS IS what I am supposed to be doing. THIS IS ME. I truly feel that I was put here to help others feel comfortable for once in their own skin and battle those demons mentally that bind us to food addiction, and disorders. It is my passion. I choose to lead. I WILL LEAD. Here's to Women. sKrew sKinny.

Here is a great article written about a year ago for the Austin Post.

1 comment:

  1. Amen!! I just came across this post and had to comment :)I can 100% relate to you, as I've been there. Good luck with everything!